The Under-Analyst

Today has the potential to be the best day of my entire life (which is saying a lot considering my wedding was pretty amazing).  For most of you out there, today is just another Thursday.  It’s a check mark on the calendar, part of your daily grind.  Maybe you’ll splurge and treat yourself to frozen yogurt?  Or just maybe you have some amazing shows saved on your TiVo ?  Good for you.  But back to me and my most amazing day ever.


Today/tonight I will be working (volunteering) a charity gala event downtown.  Why?  Because I’m super philanthropic AND because one of the guests and presenters just happens to be…   UNCLE JESSE!!!!!  OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG.

I’m going to get close to this guy….











I’ve been mentally and emotionally preparing myself for our moment.  Obviously there will be a physical jolt between the two of us. He will probably comment on the obvious connection in the air.  I’ll laugh and ask him if he likes cats.  He’ll tell me he loves them.  Then things will naturally move along and I’ll be forced to tell him that I’m married but we can be a progressive family and I can have two husbands.  He’ll agree.


And just like that, in a flash of an instant, my days at home with my cats were gone!  It seemed all very serendipitous; a phone call out of nowhere, an excited recruiter, a hippy dippy progressive private school, a brand new position, five minute commute, 8 weeks vacation…  I was SOLD.

Fast forward three months later.  I miss my cats!!!!  While I’m getting into the swing of things I must admit there are days/hours when I find myself thinking the following:

*I wonder what Gilligan and Petey are doing right now?

*I wish I was in jammies.

*I feel so uninformed now that I can’t watch Ellen.

*OMG, who is going to let the FedEx guy in?

*My midday yoga friends must think I got fat and lazy.

*Sorry environment- now I have to shower everyday.

*How can I convince my co-workers to let Petey be our intern? (Please note Gilligan is not career minded- it would interrupt his much needed 23 hours of sleep per day)

*I can only call my mom three times a day and not fifteen, bummer.

*Happy Hour has to start AFTER five o’clock?

*(more ridiculous thoughts on cats-’should I get a webcam…’)

BUT, now for the good news- since I’m making tons of mullah  I can clearly afford to buy SO MANY more cats!